This year
has been a year of clarity. As
2015 began, I must admit that I was frustrated. After several seasons of
waiting on the Lord to work His purpose in my life, it seemed as if everything
had come to a standstill. When that season of my life first began, I clung to
Psalm 138:8, a promise that the Lord would fulfill His purpose for me, that He
would not forsake me. That promise carried me through a break up into an
unexpected new relationship. Through the painful process of learning to trust
again. To love again. Through waiting to see what the future held.
And then the future, in all its mystery, came. It was nothing
that I expected it to be.
Part of me was disappointed. Disappointed that it was
nothing like the way I pictured. I have still been waiting for life to begin.
Waiting for that perfect job. Waiting for all the desires of my heart to come
to fruition.
As I type these words, I hear the fireworks being fired off.
2015 has faded away, 2016 has just begun.
…and I’m not waiting anymore.
But it is not what you think.
This year really has brought a lot of clarity. I have
finally reached a place of contentment. Contentment with who I am and where I
am at in this life. A place where I can see that while it is nothing like I expected, I am living out
all of my dreams. Dreams that for a time, I was waiting for blindly. God is
fulfilling His purpose for my life in the here and now, in the way that only He
can: in the unexpected. In ways that are even more awesome than what I could
have ever come up with on my own. I have finally reached a place where I feel
the Lord releasing me from the waiting that I have been doing for so long. Releasing me to go, to do, to be.
I don’t know what 2016 is going to bring for me. But as I
head into this new year, this new season in my faith…I’m doing it brave.
